stp being mad

How to Get a Man to Stop Being Mad at You after a Fight

The only thing worse than an argument is when the boy gets mad at you afterwards. It can be difficult to focus on something when you know there’s a guy out there who’s mad at you, even if you think it was your fault. This doesn’t have to take long, though – to stop the guy from getting mad at you, all you have to do is be honest and open with him, while also choosing a good time for the conversation.

Making up with your boyfriend after an argument

Give him time and space.

If you’ve had a fight with your boyfriend, you probably want to make things right as soon as possible. However, if he actually seems mad at you, then you may need to back off for a while. While you don’t want to wait forever for him to be good with you, it’s worth giving him a few days before he seems less harsh on you and more willing to talk to you. Even if you’re in a hurry, talking to him too soon could only lead to another argument or misunderstanding. If he completely ignores you and gives you the cold shoulder when you approach him, then he’s not ready. Don’t force it. If he’s at least open to making eye contact while talking, then he might be willing to talk to you about it.

Find the right time and place to talk when he’s ready.

Once enough time has passed and your friend seems friendlier to you and more willing to talk to you, you should find a quiet place where you can be alone to have a meaningful conversation. Make sure you pick a good time when he’s not stressed about something else and seems like he’s ready to talk. Getting the timing right can make the conversation go much smoother. Let him know you want to talk to him instead of just ambushing him and surprising him with the conversation. While he may not be looking forward to the conversation, he will want to know more than be surprised. No matter where you are, make sure it’s not easy for your friends to disturb you.

Apologize – and mean it.

If you think you’ve really screwed up, then you have to be open about it. Don’t just say, “I’m sorry you’re upset because I…” and blame him for overreacting. Instead, look him in the eye, speak slowly, cut out all distractions, and say, “I’m truly sorry for what I did.” You can then explain to him in detail how you feel and why you screwed up like this and how much it hurts you that you hurt him so badly. It depends on what you are feeling and what feelings you are ready for. On the other hand, if he’s the one who did something wrong, then you should avoid apologizing just to make things right and instead consider whether you really want him in your life.

Listen to him when he wants to talk.

Once you’ve explained your side and he’s willing to listen to you, then you should listen just as carefully when he tells you how he’s feeling. You can look him in the eye, stop fidgeting, and really listen to what he has to say to you. You might be surprised to hear how he feels. Avoid interrupting and arguing with him while he’s talking, or acting like you disagree with these things. Show him that you care enough to listen to him first. Even if you think he misunderstood what happened, it’s good to hear his side of things. Once he shares his point of view with you, you can both continue to talk about it and work to come to an agreement and make up. If you listen really well, you may find that your friend has more to say about their point of view than you thought. You might even find that you hurt him in a way that really wasn’t your intention.

Give him tender affection.

If you made up with your boyfriend, congratulations! You can get on with your life now—as long as you work to avoid repeating your mistakes. Hug or kiss him and be physically close to sealing the deal. But make sure he’s actually over it and that he’s not uncomfortable. Needless to say, you shouldn’t use affection – kisses or more – to win him back over when he’s angry, because that’s not a good solution in the long run. Once you make up, physical affection is important to continue your bond. Even touching his hand, squeezing his shoulder, or kissing his cheek can go a long way in reconnecting you.

Tell him how important he is to you.

Once you’re back on the path to being sweet and affectionate, you and your boyfriend can start getting more intimate again. Don’t be afraid to show him how much he means to you, how sad you were when he was angry, and how happy you are that he’s back in your life. Be honest about how much he means to you, and also consider showing how much you appreciate his sense of humor, his intelligence, or some other aspect of his personality. Don’t flatter him or tell him you’re madly in love with him when you’re not. Be honest about what he really means to you. Let him know how sad your life has been since your fight and how hard it is to get through the day without him by your side.

Make a romantic gesture.

Don’t think boys don’t like romance! Girls can be just as romantic as boys, and you can find something romantic that will make your boyfriend swoon. Make him a CD, buy him tickets to his favorite band, write him a letter saying how much he means to you, or surprise him with a surprise date. These things can help your friend understand how much you hate fighting and how much he means to you. Of course, this isn’t about how much money you spend, and money will never solve your romantic problems, but it’s the thought and the effort that counts.

Does something he’s always wanted to do.

Another way to reconnect with your boyfriend is to do something new and exciting that he’s always wanted to do. Maybe he’s always wanted to go rock climbing; go to a gym and see if it’s something you’d enjoy. Maybe he would like to go to a baseball game with you; go along and don’t complain that you don’t like sports. Maybe there’s a new restaurant he was talking about – surprise him with a reservation. The most important thing here is that you make this thing up all by yourself. This shows that you care what he likes. Again, before you plan an elaborate surprise, make sure he’s genuinely willing to make up with you again, or your plans will fall through.

Take things slow for a while.

After making up with your boyfriend, you should take extra care when you’re with him. Try not to bring up sensitive topics, especially the subject you were fighting about, and try to be peaceful, easy-going, and fun. You shouldn’t act like a completely different person who just wants to placate him, but you should think when you’re talking to him and try to avoid arguing with him again. If you’re desperate to move your relationship forward, allow some time before you say “I love you” for the first time, move in together, or travel, or do anything else to further strengthen your relationship.

Don’t try too hard.

It’s important to reconnect with your boyfriend, but even making up with someone has its limits. If you try to talk to him over and over again, shower him with love letters, or call him all the time, or ask him if he loves you, you’ll only bring more insecurity into the relationship and make it harder for both of you to let everything heal after your strife. Instead, take it slow and trust that your relationship will grow stronger over time. If he has forgiven you but still needs his space, give him time and he will come to you when he is ready.

Making up with a male friend after an argument

Don’t gossip about him to other friends.

If one of your friends is mad at you, you may be tempted to tell your friends about it. However, you should avoid talking about it unless you’re actually seeking advice on how to salvage the situation. If you talk bad about him or say negative things about him when he’s not around, then he’ll probably find out and be angrier at you than ever. In fact, it’s far better to say good things about him “behind his back” so he’s more apt to forgive you when he hears about it.

Be honest about what happened.

It can be difficult for men to be honest with one another, but if you want to take the friendship further, then honesty is the best solution. Let him know what caused the argument and what you wish you had done differently. If you’re open and honest with him in that moment, then he’s more likely to trust you and want to be your friend again. Let him know how you really feel and what you want out of your conversation. Don’t play cool just because you’re afraid to show your true feelings.

Apologize and make up when you’re both ready.

Tell him that you felt awful after the fight and that you hate falling out with him and that you value his friendship very much and that you can’t imagine your life without him. If you really did make a mistake, then it’s time to admit it and tell him what you did and how you’re feeling so you can both move on from this point. just let it out Say, “I’m really sorry I hurt your feelings. I really regret that.” Don’t give him a half-hearted apology just so you can both move on; show him that you really mean it.

Hug you

If you and this friend are close friends, then hugging is okay. When you’re both truly made up and you’re glad you’re friends again, give him a hug to show him how much he really means to you. Men often don’t verbally express how much a friendship really means to them, so if you’re shy about talking about it, you should explain as best you can what he means to you and then hug him to complete your deal to seal. If you’ve never hugged him before, you might be nervous, but it won’t be anything special if you act like it’s normal.

Be extra friendly afterwards.

Once you make up, you can be extra nice to your buddy without it seeming like you’re just trying to flatter him so he doesn’t get mad anymore. Do him a small favor like getting him coffee when he needs it, or help him study for a job or prepare for an interview. You can also just treat him with a little more care and respect and avoid upsetting him or making careless comments. If you can think of something he would like to do, such as B. Going to a concert or a movie, invite him to come along.

Don’t let this happen again.

If you really want to prove to him that you’ve learned your lesson, then you should tread carefully. Avoid fighting with him again, and more importantly, avoid doing what caused the argument. Be more careful about how you behave and learn to understand his body language and facial expressions better to know when he is uncomfortable or angry and try to avoid it. If you just keep acting the same way and you keep fighting, you’ll never have a fulfilling friendship together. If you really care about your buddy, then you should be willing to change.

Know what not to do under any circumstances

Don’t apologize via text or online.

One thing to avoid is apologizing to the guy via text, Facebook, email, or any other way that doesn’t require you to be in front of him in person. Apologizing personally shows that you care and that you are not a coward. Of course, if there are special circumstances where you and the boy are hundreds of miles apart, then a phone call might be best, but you should be strong and apologize personally to show him he’s worth the trouble . If you apologize online or via text, the guy will think you didn’t care enough to take the time and effort. If you don’t apologize personally, the guy might not even reply to you.

Don’t ask him a thousand times if he’s still mad at you.

That’s never a good tactic. Of course, you’re anxious to know if the guy is mad at you or not, but asking him over and over if he is is a guarantee of making things worse. Even if you think it will help if you ask him, it will actually take him longer to get over it because he will be constantly reminded of what happened. The truth is that you will know instinctively when he has truly gotten over it. Asking him a thousand times won’t change anything.

Don’t make a fake apology.

If you really want the boy to stop being mad at you, don’t make a lame apology where it quickly becomes apparent that you’re only apologizing to him so he won’t be mad at you anymore. Don’t say something like “I think I have to apologize” or “I’m sorry” in a passive-aggressive manner. Instead, let him know that your feelings are real and that you genuinely regret it. If you apologize and clearly don’t mean it, it won’t get you anywhere. Look him in the eye, turn your body toward the guy, and show him how hurtful you are while apologizing. Don’t make excuses for your behavior. Take responsibility for what happened.

Don’t mistime this conversation.

Another thing to avoid is trying to work things out with the guy at the wrong time. Don’t try to talk to him just when he has something important to do, like playing a soccer tournament, going to a job interview, or writing a thesis. Make sure you talk to him when he’s free and not stressed. You should also avoid asking him if he’s mad in front of other people; if you don’t bother to talk to him personally, it shows a lack of sincerity. If you ask him at a bad time, he’ll be annoyed that you didn’t give more thought to when a good time to talk would be, so you’re off to a bad start.

Don’t try to patch things up too soon.

Of course, we all hate it when we know someone is mad at us. But if the guy is really upset, then you shouldn’t try to make up with him that same day. Give him a few days, maybe even a few weeks, to let you both settle down before you can start talking and being friends again. If you start talking to him right away, he won’t be ready to listen just yet and will only get more and more annoyed – and angry. It can be difficult to show patience in a situation like this, but you must learn to do just that. Find a way to keep yourself occupied until the boy is ready to talk. In the meantime, you can prepare yourself exactly what you’re going to say to him.

 

About the Author

Daniel Carter

Daniel Carter is a senior writer and editor at CouponKirin. His work has been featured by The Associated Press, USA Today, the Chicago Tribune, and Reuters. He holds a bachelor's degree in journalism from University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. When he’s not writing about money, Carter enjoys traveling around the world.